The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for. – Maureen Dowd
I’m amazed at how exhausted I am. Another zero seems to do the trick and I have just enough time to enjoy it in this lovely village tucked into the mountains. I should finish walking in less than two weeks. How about them apples?!
I sleep late, enjoy coffee and the New York Times on a private porch, walk to the local store to resupply, run into Pinky from way back at Walker Pass – who tells me she was stalked by a mountain lion – lunch at the Red Kettle, create another ‘Peeps of the PCT,’ dine at Ferro, get nervous about crossing a rockslide tomorrow, then cuddle into an enormous bed where I can spread out and let my legs rest up for the coming miles.
Last night I dreamt I could still play the flute but was forced to re-audition for my job, much to my dismay. In fact every night my subconscious works overtime replaying a humiliating saga of my having to prove my worth. Enough already! Just let me sleep and get on with things!
So here’s a question you might help me answer:
Is it possible – and I’m speaking metaphorically here – is it possible to continue to walk the trail after I finish walking the trail?
I realize this is a bit of a koan or riddle that I have no satisfying answer to, but I wholeheartedly welcome yours.
For now, it’s (hopefully) a dreamless sleep so I can build up the reserves of courage I’ll need to vanquish the rock slide and slay double digit miles from one water source to the next – thankfully, this time with guaranteed camping!
17 Responses
The picture of you sitting by huge wildlife statute should be the cover of your book on hiking the PCT! Following that, to answer your question about continuing to walk the trail after you have finished it: I think you will always have memories and dreams of the amazing hiking you have done this past year! It will be an experience that you never stop thinking about! That is good! I am so proud of you and what you have accomplished and you have to know that what you have done is basically unbelievable – thats why those of us who followed your journeys are so amazed at you and your strong will and fortitude!
I feel incredibly blessed! Richard sent me on the PCT, somehow knowing me better than I know myself. I can hardly believe what I’ve done!! I will walk still, maybe only small trails near my home, but they will be filled with the TA and PCT.
Alison….you look flashy, woman!….in a good way. This experience would
cause anyone to re-live it in dreams later…not to worry…..keep on going
and always be mindful….do not lose your camera….Ms Ansel Adams!
You will make a wonderful compendium of your experiences….I just
know you will! I am so lucky to have followed your Blogs….Zola
I write to share, of course, but it also helps me frame my experience as it happens. The camera makes me see and the words make me feel. I am deeply touched you came with me, Zola.
Alison,
Before you complete your hike, I wanted to tell you how much I have enjoyed following your journey. Thank you for letting me share this experience with you. I wish I had some advice or words of wisdom to share with you about hiking after your hike. This is what I think about when things seem dark.
Before we moved to Minnesota my wife and I lived in Arizona. While there, I learned to fly sailplanes over the desert. Sailplanes can fly for hours on invisible columns of rising air called thermals. You can probably see the dust devils across the ground where you are now.
Here’s how it works. A shadow in the desert makes a cool spot which causes the warm air to rush in from all sides. Since it has no where else to go, it goes up. If it goes high enough, the hot air hits the cooler air and forms a cloud. The cloud makes a shadow which makes a cool spot which makes another thermal.
So, the lift makes the cloud and the cloud makes the lift.
I think there’s life lesson in there somewhere. The natural cycles are neither wrong or right, they just are. I know that you have experienced some dark clouds this year. Maybe those are the things that bring the lift.
Tim, this is so beautiful! I am deeply touched. There is so much in the natural world that teaches me about life, and the trail itself illustrates trust and patience as well as joy in the moment. Your imagery is a magical one I will hold close in the final days.
When I was in high school, I was part of the downhill ski club. Every Sunday, the school (I went to boarding school) would take a bunch of us up to Snoqualmie to go skiing for six or seven hours at a time. That night, back in my dorm room, as I was drifting off to sleep, I would see, hear, and feel the snow under my feet and found my self “skiing” in bed as I swooshed down the mountain. I thought I was the only one doing this until I realized that my roommate, on the other side of the room was also “skiing” her way to sleep each Sunday night. So, yes, I think you may keep walking after you are done walking. And not just the PCT, but any of the hikes you’ve done.
Sometimes in my dreams, I’m back in the studio ready to panic because there is no music pulled (pre-computer days) to play, and the station manager is waiting with skimmer tape at the ready and pen in hand.