The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for. – Maureen Dowd
I’m amazed at how exhausted I am. Another zero seems to do the trick and I have just enough time to enjoy it in this lovely village tucked into the mountains. I should finish walking in less than two weeks. How about them apples?!
I sleep late, enjoy coffee and the New York Times on a private porch, walk to the local store to resupply, run into Pinky from way back at Walker Pass – who tells me she was stalked by a mountain lion – lunch at the Red Kettle, create another ‘Peeps of the PCT,’ dine at Ferro, get nervous about crossing a rockslide tomorrow, then cuddle into an enormous bed where I can spread out and let my legs rest up for the coming miles.
Last night I dreamt I could still play the flute but was forced to re-audition for my job, much to my dismay. In fact every night my subconscious works overtime replaying a humiliating saga of my having to prove my worth. Enough already! Just let me sleep and get on with things!
So here’s a question you might help me answer:
Is it possible – and I’m speaking metaphorically here – is it possible to continue to walk the trail after I finish walking the trail?
I realize this is a bit of a koan or riddle that I have no satisfying answer to, but I wholeheartedly welcome yours.
For now, it’s (hopefully) a dreamless sleep so I can build up the reserves of courage I’ll need to vanquish the rock slide and slay double digit miles from one water source to the next – thankfully, this time with guaranteed camping!
17 Responses
Wonderful to see the end of the journey ahead. I’ve so enjoyed your posts. A book based on this would be perfect.
But I’m wishing you all the best after the hiking is finished (for now).
thank you, Lisa! It’s winding down slowly, which is unusual for me but feels just right. I am preparing to come home.
Alison – Here’s a resounding YES! to your hiking the PCT and to those comments above about what it means to the commentators to continue the walking after the walking is done. Pretty much, we have laid out your book for you: you have a cover picture, you have the stories, photos, structure (the journey motif!) for the contents, and all this commentary for an afterward! Easy peasy to smush all of this into a big, fat coffee table book–after hiking 3,000 miles, writing a book will be the equivalent of crossing a rockslide. Here’s another, more metaphysical thought: think of all the thinking your writing about walking these magnificent trails around the world have made your READERS think! In so many ways, we’re walking along with you, which accomplishes the goal of continuing your walk after walking, since we’re thinking about your walking. Maybe that’s a way to think about the “legs” your walks have had–they’re ours, too, and for which we thank you, heartfelt and on-going . . . and the walking continues long after the hike is accomplished. Godspeed!
wow! this is fantastic. You know, the most powerful moments of my life have been as a teacher or mentor. My flute students were more than musicians, they were like children or maybe my teachers of how to explain and help so they could be their own best teachers. If anything I’ve shared helps someone else think, I am incredibly blessed!
James Thurber wrote, “Let us not look back in anger, nor forward in fear, but around in awareness.” I first learned of awareness backpacking in the Big Horns of Wyoming and the Bear Tooth of Montana. It was exhilarating, charming, and occasionally terrifying. I had no time for resentments of the past or fears of the future. I was totally focused on the present and seeing for the first time my environment in different levels of understanding. On the occasions decades later when I achieve total awareness, I think back of those high mountain trips and what they taught me. It will be the same for you. Incidentally, Mr. Schoonhoven above wrote a beautiful and appropriate comment that I found incredibly thoughtful.
I will ponder this quote in my final days. Isn’t that amazing how such beauty focuses us into the ‘now?’ I am deeply touched you came with me on this journey, Ed!
Dear Alison, you will always remember walking this trail and think of the trails not yet taken as long as you are able. That is the way life should be. looking to a positive future rather than past negativity. You are heroic !
I am SO glad we saw each other during my hike! You helped me so much to take that positive fork in the trail. I am impressed by you, Dave, and so glad we’re friends.